What was so simple in the moonlight now is so complicated...a sense of wonder only slighty used
psycodorkgrl
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Name: rachel
Country: United States
State: California
Metro: Mountain View
Birthday: 4/20/1989
Gender: Female


Interests: band...... music..... anything to do with sound!
Expertise: 'So long, everything' he shouted, then he ran next door to Margot's house. 'I'm moving' he said. 'Where' asked Margot. 'Two weeks away' said Mitchell. 'Where is that' asked Margot. 'It's everywhere I will be after I walk for two weeks' said Mitchell. 'I have lived in the same place for a long time. It is time for me to go some place else.' 'No' said Margot, 'you have only lived next door for fifteen years.' 'Sixteen' said Mitchell. 'Fifteen, six, what's the difference' said Margot. 'I want you to stay next door forever.' 'I can't' said Mitchell. 'I do not want to go wake up in the same old bedroom and eat breakfast in the same old kitchen. Every room in my house is the some old room because I have been there too long.'
Occupation: Student
Industry: Art


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Member Since: 7/17/2003

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Saturday, May 14, 2005

There are so many "why cant I" questions I ask each day.

Why cant I just find him? Why cant I just be good at this? Why cant I just go through with it? Why cant I just be happy with it?

And I need to just stop and turn them "I will" into statments.

I will find him someday. I will be good at this. I will go through with this. I will be happy.

Its all in the choice. I dont think I can say that enough. And I used to say it for your benifit, but now I realize its mainly for mine. I need to remind myself. Say hey you are a good person. Ok so this didnt work out. Life goes on.

I will...

What are you going to turn into an "I will" statment?


Sunday, May 01, 2005

Its funny how much crap you can go through with a person, fights name calling hatred, and yet nothing changes.

Well there becomes a point where you just stop caring. And thats what I have done. There is no more point in puting effort into something that gives me nothing back.

But I am not sad or mad about this. I've realized that by going through those emotions is also putting in effort not needed. So Im all done. I will only put it what I get. Maybe not even all of that.

Ok so Im so excited. I have a new shopping buddy. And it makes my stomche fly like butterflies are in it. Maybe I wont learn much but its still great. This is what I'll put my effort into now.

Now Playing
Something For Rockets
(Playing may 20th at hush hush!) <---------Im excited!


Sunday, April 24, 2005

You know, life aint so bad.

It amazing how much we emphasize the things that are going wrong. We see it as all that we are, and that nothing can ever be better. We go to sleep dreaming of how we really want life. People come up to me day after day and complain to me about this and that.

If only we could all just step back and see how absolutley fabulous we all have it. Ok so your not having such a good time with your friend. Look at how many others you have that love. Maybe you didnt reach that goal you were really striving for. Look at all you had acomplished on the way.

And if life is really bad at the moment, then change it. Belive you me I definatly know that life isnt all candyland. But choices are your own. And life is constantly changing. Mold it to where you want it to be.

You are the only one living your life. Many people are helping you, but when it comes down to it, its just that soul. Utalize every part of it. And thank those who are helping. Its not an easy task you know.

Love life, love the people in yours, and make it your own!

Currently Playing
Greatest Hits
By Neil Young
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Saturday, April 23, 2005

Wow what a birthday. And its still not over. Probably one of the best I ve ever had. Which doesnt really compare to much because one year I got a storage bin and backrest.

My one birthday wish came true. It might be lame, but having balloons at school was so awesome.

I cant wait till sunday. Its going to be so exciting and interesting. Hopfully everyone will show up.

Thnx to everyone. It was fabulous.

Currently Playing
Golden Age of Radio [Bonus Tracks]
By Josh Ritter
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Saturday, April 09, 2005

1. Thats fine, I guess Im ok with it. It was a one time thing and I understand. But I am glad that we have been able to talk and get to know each other better lately.

2. I likes you in middle school and that was it. You had your chance and you acted stupid, its not my fault. And Im so tired of you trying to make it up. You need to get to know your feelings more. I so like talking to you when your happy though. Some <3.

3. Im so glad that we've gotten to know each other this year. You are so funny! I really appericiate your curiosity and understanding. Much <3!

4. I love you, but your such a scenester. And please stop telling the world Im gay. I tell people when I want to, its not your job. And you also need to learn when its appropriate to put your opnion in. I am glad we are still friends though. Lots of <3!

5. Its really quite sad, but Im getting really annoyed of you. I dont want to be your monerator anymore. Its a job that you have to learn to do. And you really shouldnt burden me with it. Kinda <3.

6. Dude you just need to learn when to shut up. You annoy everyone and its a surprise that your still let in on everything. And we all hate your whining, it pisses us off so much. Just stop! No <3 here!

7. Come on, just do it. Dont leave me hanging like this.

8. Fuck your to needy. You need to learn that life is the way it is and that all that it is. Stop creating false situations, you know they dont mean anything. And stop expecting so much. All it leads to is disappointment. But god I give you so much <3!

9. I need to talk to you. Why cant I just get up and pick up the phone. There is so much to tell you. And I still think about tellin you how much I love you. Maybe someday. You would probably just look at my wierd and teach me a lesson though. Your so awesome! <3 Much!

10. I bet you would be so cool if you didnt follow her. But everything that comes out of your mouth are her words. Stop following her, shes not that special. Be cool with yourself. And start liking some boys. Much <3!

Currently Playing
Transatlanticism
By Death Cab for Cutie
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